Tape is a horrible substitute for communication

When you're married you realize that you and your wife grew up very differently. To be sure, you were most likely raised in the same country, with the same basic education, maybe even the same taste in movies, music, etc. although there are plenty of exceptions to that. However, there are hundreds, maybe thousands, of 'insignificant' methods that we grew up with that are polar opposites from our spouse. Allow me to clarify. My wife and I have two jars of white-colored sandwich spread in our house. They are made very similarly. They have almost identical packaging and you can find them next to each other on the grocery store shelf. Yet if one of us puts the wrong one on our sandwich, it renders it inedible. This brings me to my next point. The consumate conservationist, or creature of habit depending on who you ask, I like to reuse the same cup from day to day. This is a method I developed at a young age and it makes as much sense to me as eating leftovers, toilet paper going over the roll, or calling macaroni and cheese -- "cheese noodles." Unfortunately, as procupreusing as I am, my wife is equally anticupreusing. She has no problem with using a different cup every single day. Sometimes twice a day! This didn't really become an issue, per se, until our nanny started using my favorite kind of cup. I swear water tastes better when summoned from the delicate grasp of this holy goblet. My stash of eight has also been raided for heating baby formula, another lowly purpose in my estimation. Consequently, I have on recent occasion come to find myself drinking out of an inferior demitasse as the store of suitable vessels has been depleted. My frustration grew from day to day until yesterday, I decided to place a cup on top of the refrigerator, in a conscription-free zone. Later, when I came to use it, I found that my efforts to preserve my cup's freedom from the dishwasher had been twarted. Emboldened by this apparent coup d' etat I grabbed a foot-long piece of scotch tape and a new cup, securing it firmly in its predecessor's spot. It wasn't until later, while trying to use the cup and find a way to preserve the adhesive tether that I realized my own stupidity. I looked at myself and my effort to fight for what I wanted and just how silly I looked with a twelve-inch piece of tape hanging off my elbow while drinking a glass of water. It made me realize how far I haven't come in my ability to communicate instead of fighting for what I believe in.

Tired of the same old..?

Republican. Jihad. Christian Coalition. Conservative. Terrorist. Liberal. Religious. Fanatic. Moral Majority. Democrat. American Civil Liberties Union. These elicit anything from discomfort to downright nausea in me. Why you ask? Because they all represent extremism. I can no more stand watching the American flag burned in the streets of Tehran than listen to Alan Keyes, Republican Candidate for Illinois Senate, make the audacious claim, in 2004, that Jesus Christ would not vote for Barack Obama. Does it concern anyone else that president-elect of a major religious right lobbying group, Rev. Joel C. Hunter, chose to step down because the group resisted his proposal? Sounds petty and immature like a grown-up I'm-gonna-take-my-ball-and-go-home. It shouldn't. Rev. Hunter left because the Christian Coalition didn't want to broaden its agenda to include reducing poverty and fighting global warming. Let me say that again. The Christian Coalition did not want to add helping poor people and taking care of the Earth to its lobbying platform. Is the fight against gay rights and legalized abortion so precious and important that we cannot add a cause as worthy as feeding and clothing the needy people of our own country or making sure that our grandchildren aren't buying SPF 200 suntan lotion? Wait, I almost forgot it's almost been a year since they boycotted any lingere stores or atheist-themed children's movies. They have a lot on their plate, don't they? Speaking of screwed-up agendas, the ACLU, in the midst of its valiant effort to strip religious organizations of their tax-exempt status, has managed to fight FOR the rights of a coven of witches in Providence, RI. Now how would the very busy ACLU get enough money to fight a court battle over some Rhode Island witches' tax shelter? Do you know who pays for the ACLU's attorneys' fees? See for yourself Title 42 Chapter 21 Subchapter I § 1988(b). In case you couldn't tell, the "such officer shall not be held liable for the costs" part is the moneymaker. That means that you as a taxpaying American are paying the lawyers that fight to take away the tax-exempt status of churches AND a cool $42,700 in legal fees and court costs for a lawsuit that got a 16th century replica painting of Jesus off a Slidell [LA] City Courthouse wall. Whew! I wasn't going to be able to sleep tonight if we didn't get that thing down. Hey, while we're talking about Louisiana, it would seem a shame not to mention the instrumental role that the ACLU proudly played in having the Supreme Court rule in favor of the Petitioner in Kennedy vs. Louisiana effectively striking down the ability for states to administer the death penalty for child rapists. Worthy cause. Where's my checkbook?

Brother can you spare a...dollar?

So it has come to this. Our dollar is literally not worth the paper it's printed on anymore. The Government Accountability Office (GAO) along with the US Treasury Department estimates that a newly minted dollar bill stays in circulation for around 21 months compared to around 30 years for coins. The savings to US taxpayers for switching over to the new Presidential Series coins is $522 million a year. What? Why didn't we stick with this years ago during the Eisenhower, Susan B, and most recent Sacajawea incarnations? Countries everywhere have coined denominations equivalent to a dollar -- Canada, The European Union, Japan, and Mexico to name a few. The most common response is that Americans don't like carrying a lot of change. I can't wrap my brain around that reasoning. Every year a half a billion dollars goes down the drain so our pockets don't rip. Now this blogger is well aware of the apparent contradiction to a previous post where he didn't want 99 cents change, but let's not focus on the wrong thing.

The Aberration of Autonomy

This and every year we have a day to celebrate our independence -- our independence from so-called tyranny. From preschool on we've been taught to pledge our allegiance to a nation that was founded on the simple principal that its government would be instituted to protect the rights of the people who gave it the right to exist. Therefore, we separated ourselves from a government who exploited us, so we could perserve our freedom, our independence (cue Stars and Stripes Forever or some other inspiring, patriot march-sung-Sousa). Now 232 years in the making (yeah, I did the math), we are a country of independents. In election years, it is the undecided, non-affiliated independents that swing our vote. On the world stage, our tendency toward unilateral policy has given our nation a reputation as a maverick state. For decades upon centuries our sense of independence has evolved into so much more than freedom from authoritarian regimes. We've marginalized morals by allowing exceptions to the rule. Statements of gray pepper every media outlet and water cooler discussion. "Only 5 miles over." "I'll count it as a business expense." "It's only cheating if she finds out." By now, we have declared our independence from everything beginning with posted speed limits, to income taxes, to fidelity, and from unflinching honesty in favor of personal gain. In fact, our entitlement to freedom has given us the audacity to allow the press to report information that damages our national security, and people to march through our streets with swastikas and raised fists, or the interpretation of cruel and unusual punishment to include cold meals and no cable television in prison. So we freely create an environment where our sense of independence can roam, but we screen from view the very things that are suffocating our self-reliance. Independence from what? Foreign oil, disaster relief, farm subsidies, Social Security, falsified income statements, adjustable-rate mortgages? More than ever, we are dependent on everyone but ourselves leaving us to contend with the illusion that we are what we want to be.

$4.01

Oh no! I can't believe I am going to get 99 cents change back. I'd rather be able to fold my change and stick it in my billfold, not jingle around for the rest of the day, or worse, lose most of it in the next insatiable couch that comes my way. I see that the clerk has six pennies on top of the register, but they're not in a tray. If they were in a tray, I could assume they were for anyone to use. Can't she sense that I am in need? I blurt out a feeble, "Wait. Let me see if I have a penny here." I reach in my pockets futily, but convincingly, I hope. Why am I so careful to deposit my change in the jar every night? This ritual perpetuates itself leaving me void of much-needed coins at times such as these. Meanwhile, the other customers are beginning to lose patience with my obvious posturing. I feel their stares. I am sure that more than one of them is thinking of offering me a penny themselves. So why do we refuse to intervene in situations when an obvious need presents itself? Could it be that we don't want our gesture of charity to be misconstrued as pity? Perhaps we are uncomfortable with the prospect that we've misread the need thereby offering assistance when none is needed. I sigh at the feeling of pocket lint between my fingers. "Sorry, I guess I don't have one," I lament, accepting my fate of pockets as heavy as my heart. Why do I feel like she owed it to me to take one of the pennies off the register? More importantly, if I felt entitled to it, why didn't I ask her to use one for my transaction? The question begs at the table of society. It's not about the penny. It's about identifying need and responding to it. It's not about me. At least not as the recipient of grace. It's about my own blindness, ignorance, and selfishness in the face of need. I have a laundry list of excuses to match every circumstance in which I withhold assistance to others. Here is the chronicle of my efforts to exchange excuses for action.